Woman Marries Herself After Divorce, Says Life is Just Beginning

For over 30 years, Kalu Zhang lived according to what others expected of her first as a daughter, then a wife and later a mother. She’s 49, divorced and raising two kids and she has decided to put herself first.

Zhang, who moved from China to Australia in the early 2000s, once dreamed of becoming a fashion designer.

But family pressures led her to a more practical career as an accountant. Later, marriage and motherhood took over, and she lost herself in the process.

“I spent years devoted to my family,” Zhang said. “After my divorce, I wanted to live for myself.”

On February 9, Zhang finally had the wedding she had always dreamed of not to a partner, but to herself.

She walked down the aisle in a wedding dress of her own design, complete with a veil and hair accessories, at a “marry yourself” event in Melbourne.

She was one of 13 women at the ceremony, which was meant to encourage self-love and personal growth.

The event welcomed women from all walks of life both those who are single, married, divorced and who wanted a day just for themselves, free from societal expectations.

“I see this as a fresh start,” Zhang said. “A woman’s beauty doesn’t fade with age, it grows with confidence and experience.”

Why Women Are Choosing This Path

Lei Liu, a celebrant and the event organizer, said that women especially in Asian cultures are often expected to put others first.

“From a young age, we’re taught to be good daughters, good wives, good mothers. But no one asks us what we want,” Liu explained.

Professor Fran Martin from the University of Melbourne sees the trend as part of a bigger movement.

More women are choosing independence, delaying marriage, or focusing on their own happiness instead of following traditional expectations.

“It’s not just about ‘marrying yourself,’” Martin said. “It’s about taking yourself seriously as the main character in your own life.”

For Zhang, this event was about more than just wearing a wedding dress. It was about reclaiming her life.

“I don’t see a failed marriage as a failure in life,” she said. “It’s just one chapter. There are still many more pages to write.”

And as for love? She’s open to it. “If I meet the right person, I’ll tie the knot again. But this time, on my terms.”