Keeping the Spark Alive in a Long-Term Relationship
Amara and Tunde had been married for over a decade. They’re living in the city of Abuja, their love story started with passion, excitement, and late-night conversations that stretched into the early hours.
As the years passed, life took over with work, responsibilities, and the demands of raising a family. The once-fiery romance had dimmed, replaced by routine and familiarity.
One evening, as they sat across the dinner table scrolling through their phones in silence, Amara finally spoke up, do you think we’ve lost it? she asked, looking up at Tunde.
He sighed, realizing she was right. The vibrant emotions that once made their love feel electric had faded yet neither of them was ready to give up on it.
Why Do Long-Term Relationships Lose Their Spark?
Many couples experience a shift in their relationship as time goes on. The honeymoon phase fades, and the thrill of new experiences is replaced by familiarity.
Research shows that about 29% of midlife couples describe their sex life as unsatisfactory, with 65% of people in their 50s engaging in intimacy once a week or less.
The reasons could be due to stress, busy schedules, lack of communication or simply falling into a predictable routine however, experts agree that keeping the romance alive requires effort, intention, and a willingness to try new things.
Determined to reclaim their love, Amara and Tunde decided to take action. They researched ways to rekindle the spark in a long-term relationship, and here’s what they learned.
How to Keep the Spark Alive in a Relationship
Between work and family responsibilities, couples often spend less time truly connecting.
Couples who prioritize quality time together experience deeper emotional intimacy, says relationship expert Dr. Laura Berman
Trying Out New Activities as a Couple
Trying something new together can reignite excitement so instead of sticking to their usual routine, Amara and Tunde signed up for dance classes.
The shared experience brought back the excitement they felt when they were dating. Studies show that couples who engage in novel activities together feel happier and more connected.
Communicate Openly About Your Needs
Couples may stop sharing their true thoughts and feelings. Amara and Tunde decided to have weekly check-ins, where they talked about their relationship, what was working, what wasn’t, and how they could support each other.
Show Appreciation and Affection Daily
Little gestures of love go a long way. Amara started leaving Tunde handwritten notes in his lunchbox, and Tunde made it a habit to compliment her daily.
Expressing gratitude and affection strengthens emotional bonds and helps keep romance alive.
Spice Up Intimacy
Physical intimacy is important in relationship, in order not to fall into the same patterns, Amara and Tunde discussed their desires and explored ways to make their intimate life exciting again.
After a few months of making these changes, Amara and Tunde felt closer than they had in years.
Their connection deepened, their conversations became more meaningful, and the excitement of being together returned.